Saturday, February 11, 2017

Why Christian Women Shouldn't See 50 Shades

Call me a rule follower. Call me innocent. Call me ignorant. Call me what you will, but when someone says, "You shouldn't do this or that," I'm one to generally fall in line and obey. When I understood the content of the first installment of books and subsequent movie for 50 Shades of Grey, I knew enough to know it wasn't something I needed to dabble in. I had heard it enough times that Christian women should not go watch this movie much less read the book, and thus that was enough for me. Until now.

On this side of marriage. Now it wants me to stand my ground and tell others why we shouldn't go see this movie.

Though I've never delved into that realm of wanting to know anything about the book, I did find myself looking through more of the plot yesterday and was nauseous. I was nauseous because of the damage soft porn and pornography in general causes to marriages.

It is well known in the Christian community of the prevalence of porn among men; however, movies of this nature offer an option for women. According to a study done by SAGU in 2015, a Christian university, 17% of women in their study population claimed an addiction to pornography. The study also showed 1 in 3 visitors to a pornography website are women. You can read the full article here.

What are the implications?
The multi-million dollar pornography industry creates a dissatisfaction in marriages by allowing men and women to have their sexual fantasies met by means other than their spouse. There are multiple levels in which I could address this; however, I want to look at the emotional/mental aspect. A woman or man who entertains a situation in a hard/soft porn website/book/movie allows thoughts to enter into their mind that are far above the reality of normal sex. Because these expectations far exceed the God-honoring sex sanctioned between a husband and wife, the partner entertaining such situations withdraws from the other and withholds the love and intimacy that are part of the core of sustaining a marriage.

More importantly it leads to a dishonoring of the marriage bed. In Hebrews 13:4, the writer of the letter proclaims: Let marriage be held in honor among all, and the let the marriage bed be undefiled.
The marriage bed is for the man and woman. It is for them to enjoy between the two of them. This is the way God designed it.

This industry and its many components are the "foxes" Solomon wrote about that attempt to sneak in and damage the joy to be experienced between a man and a woman - the intimacy ordained by God between them alone.

In closing, I am reminded of Proverbs 4:23 that admonishes us to guard our hearts. I always thought of this verse in the sense of dating and not giving my heart away to various young men. Yet, it is greatly applicable beyond that thought process - particularly here. Those in Christ are to ever be guarding what enters their minds and hearts. What enters into the heart and mind will steer our course. What may seem harmless will in fact harm over the longer course. Christian woman, guard your heart while you guard your eyes.

Treasure your mind.
Treasure your heart.
Treasure the man in front of you.
Treasure the man who will one day be yours, if the Lord wills.
Treasure your God.


  1. Yes! Just this weekend I was at a basketball game and they had some dancers do a hip-hop routine during the halftime show. They were twerking and grinding and everything in their little shorts, and I reached over to cover up my husband's eyes. Someone asked me what I was doing, and I replied that I didn't think my husband (or I) should have to see that. We work very hard to guard our hearts and minds from unwholesome things.

    1. I know! We have to do the same thing every now and then. But I know the benefit of guarding our hearts and minds will pay greater interest in our marriage.